ecovlke's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 18: The Rise And FALL Of 1987 Chapter 18: The Rise And FALL Of 1987 Back once again to my early years. A lot of events took place during the fall of 1987. Events which would have effects on my life to this day. During the summer of '87 I was introduced to, and started dating a nursing student that I met at work. She was black and the closet thing to a Native American that I could find. There was not an abundant supply of Indian girls in Arkansas where we lived. My girlfriend, I guess you could call her that, had a boyfriend back home. We went out a lot, but she was not sure if she wanted to get serious. But I was very happy with the time that we spent together, but my adoptive father was not. He had never met her, but he had preconceived notions about her because of the color of her skin. So he proceded to find me a girl that was more to his liking. My father and a girl that I had known since first grade told me about a girl who was interested in meeting me. They wanted me to go to this party just to meet her. All week long I was told how much this girl was dying to meet me. So I went to the party to meet this girl and to make my father happy. I was sitting on the couch feeling uncomfortable because I did not really know anyone at this party. When the girl finally came she was introduced to me, and she showed no interest at all. Boom. Over. And she was gone. So I hung around just for the alcohol. I was feeling like an idiot. As the evening dragged on, those old feelings of rejection from my high school days started to set in like gang green. Like rigor mortis. People were paring off and either leaving, or finding secluded places in the house to be alone. I don't remember seeing the girl that I had came to meet too much that evening. Even though she gave me the cold shoulder I was still intrigued with her. So I stayed partly because of this, and I also because I was embarrassed. As I sat alone drinking my beer, I heard someone crying. I got up and started looking for the source. The sound took me to the dark laundry room where I found, huddle up in the corner, the girl that I had came to meet. She was crying because some guy that she had a crush on had left with someone else. A situation I knew very well. So I sat down beside her, and we started to talk. She keep crying and telling me how nobody liked her, and that nobody was intersted in her. I tried to get her to understand that I did. That I was interested. So we talked for a long time. I asked her if she would like to go out sometime, and she said yes. Well here is where the story started to go the way of all of my romance stories. Rejection on the morning of the planned date. She told me that she couldn't go out with me. I jumped to the conclusion that it was because I was Indian. So I told my father this. I asked him how it felt to know that his son was rejected because of the color of his skin just like he rejected my black girlfriend. So my father went and asked the girl if this was why she turned down our date. But it turned out that because she was just out of high school and had only turned 18 the week before, and that I was 24 and divorced with a daughter, her father thought I was too adanced or worldly for her. We knew a lot of the same people so we saw each other at different parties through the years. I always felt a certain something when I saw her. She would make my heart soar and ache. I was always glad when I heard that she was going to be at a party. She was the only reason that I went to a lot of them. During the years I moved back to Oklahoma and went back to college. It was an Indian school so I meet a lot of Indian girls. I had another daughter with a Cheyenne girl that I met in school. I dated an got engaged to a cousin by accident (This story is worth a diary entry by itself). I meet a Hopi girl at college. We married the year after we graduated and moved to Arkansas. We had a daughter. So now I have three daughters. I was married to this girl for about five years when she left me for another guy. She was almost eight years younger than me. She was 18 when we met, and I was 25. So by the time she was 25 I was just "too old" for her clocking in at the age of 32. This was 1995. So I started seeing this girl from work who had a husband who left her for someone else. I was not happy in this relationship. She was too jealous and our relationship was not a healthy one. She kept trying to get me to move in with her. I had met another black girl that lived in the apartment next to me. We started going out, but eventually she moved and so I was alone again. So one night I was going to a party that I knew that this girl from the fall of 1987 was going to be at. Since that night back in '87, and every time I saw her at parties through the years my heart burned for her. So I decided to gather up all of my nerve and asked her out again. She taught I was joking, but she still gave me the "call me" thumb and pinky finger to the side of the head signal as she left that night. This was January of 1996. 8:01 p.m. - 2001-11-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||
|
||||||